EVE decided it kneaded a better name — and yet it chose Dough

Dough is fantastic. You can make bread with it! Not to mention biscuits, cookies, pies, pizzas, pasta, and pastry. But — to the best of our knowledge — you cannot make a PC monitor with the stuff.

Perhaps that’s why I can’t stop giggling at this message (via Liliputing):

Eve is the company that makes the remarkably well-reviewed but pricey Spectrum monitor — and before that, the disastrously crowdfunded Eve V tablet.

Now, the company’s name is Dough.

Which, grammatically speaking, means its flagship monitor is now the Dough Spectrum. It rolls right off the tongue.

Dough explains (lol) that it chose the name because it was, and I quote, “available”:

In the effort of cutting off shipping time and making our products widely accessible, we’re entering retail globally this year. To legally protect our brand, we need to have a name that we can trademark. Sadly, we can’t use EVE. But lucky for us, DOUGH is available.

The only other hint: Dough says it was looking for something “more passionate yet mature.”

While I have to give Dough the benefit of the doubt about that whole “trademark protection” thing — there are other famous Eves to contend with around the world, like the smart home company and the MMO — I suspect the company might also be trying to run away from some particularly crappy SEO. Despite some praise for its recent monitors, some of the highest quality Google results for the company include an excellent Engadget investigation titled “All about Eve: The upstart PC brand struggling to pay back jilted customers” and “Is The Eve Spectrum 4K a Scam? We Bought One to Find Out.”

And here’s the Google card that appears atop a search for “Eve Spectrum”. Not a great look!

Screenshot by Sean Hollister / The Verge

We’ve covered some delightfully shameful rebrands before, like WeWork’s stint as The We Company, the lying liars behind “Voltswagen,” and what happened when Disney had no Fox left to give. And of course, there’s Meta.

But Dough?

It takes the cake.